This is getting too intense

Surgeon. Soldier. Arctic fisher. Oil driller. Rene Zellweger's personal assistant. No. These are not the toughest jobs. The toughest job is trucking. Trucking puts you on the road, all to yourself. For so long. You have to drive treacherous mountain passes and groom yourself in the reflection from your truck's chrome. Trucking makes your toy-empire-wealthy father in law cut you off from the family. Or it makes you desert them to deal drugs. It's not entirely clear, but it definitely has a profound effect on your family life in one of those ways.

Grounding. Spanking. Forgetting a piano rehearsal. Diddling his girlfriend. No. These are not the most difficult transgressions for a father to atone to his son for. The most difficult transgression to atone for is deserting your family and never writing your son. Or writing your son and having your sonofabitch toy magnate father in law keep your son from getting your letters. Hundreds of letters! It doesn't help either if you're a trucker and therefore on a completely different social scale. Muscles aren't everything, after all.

Darts. Pinball. Drinking. Getting VD from truckyard hookers. No. These are not the most hardcore passtime of truckers. The most hardcore passtime is arm wrestling. It's the true test of just how enormous your triceps have become. The true test of how effective your in-cab weight pulley is. And thankfully, when they have big arm wrestling tournaments, you get a second chance to be harcore, because the tournaments are double elimination.

But if one hardcore trucker dude spends enough time with his alienated son, Lincoln Hawk might just be able to teach him a thing or two about muscles. About competitive fire. About believing in yourself. About being a better person. He might be able to begin to atone for being gone for twelve long years and driving his rig so slowly that they miss the passing of his son's mother. He might even be able to teach his son how to drive, which could theoretically come in handy. And by being hardcore and patching things over with his son, he might find the will deep within him to be the best at the most hardcore trucker passtime, to beat Survivor's Rupert at the table, and to win a critically needed new rig in the process. He might find a way to go

OVER THE TOP

May I remind you that arm wrestling tournaments are held in a double-elimination format.