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You're goddamn right we did

The Viceroy is so badass

Wish I'd worn black

Dear Boy, You Aren't The Rock and It's Called Acting

There's a famous Hollywood story about a conversation between Dustin Hoffman and Sir Laurence Olivier when they were filming the movie Marathon Man back in the 1970s.  Dustin Hoffman was/is a "method" actor, meaning (sort of) that he does in real life whatever his character does in the movie to help him "feel" the character.  Sir Laurence Olivier was an "actor" actor, meaning he understood it was make believe and actually acted his scenes and acted them well.  At one point during the movie (SPOILER) Dustin Hoffman's character doesn't sleep for something like 48 straight hours.  That meant real life Dustin Hoffman stayed up for something like 48 straight hours before shooting.  When Dustin showed up on set, disheveled, tired, and near useless, Sir Laurence, disgusted, told him, "Dear boy, it's called acting."  Sir Laurence Olivier, sometimes called the greatest actor to ever live, thought actors should act.  I wonder what he would have thought about Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior if he was still alive? He probably would have thought this: I wish I were dead, so I could spin in my grave. I wonder what Sir Laurence Olivier thinks now that he's dead. Probably nothing. I don't think the dead can think. It's sort of part of being dead.

That was a good paragraph. I don't really know what it means, but it was good. You know what isn't good? Scorpion King 2: Rise of a Warrior. Full disclosure: I, Jay!!!, was a professional wrestling fan.  A HUGE professional wrestling fan. I loved every minute of Monday Night Raw. I was very passionate. If I didn't like the scripted outcome of a match, I would say, "These people don't know anything. Clearly the other combatant should have one the fake battle of supremacy because it's so important." I wanted them all to have nice leotards. One of my favorite wrestlers was the Rock. He was the best. He's still the best. He makes movies now. His movies are for kids and are sort of stupid but not bad. He's actually an okay actor. ANYWAYS: when Scorpion King 1: No Tagline Needed came out it starred the Rock, a professional wrestling god, in his first big-screen starring role. He had previously appeared in Mummy Returns as the Scorpion King…a selfish, evil king who sold his soul to some strange devil creature, so he could obtain unlimited power only to be taken down by Brendan Fraser thousands of years later. Classic yarn.